How To Split the Cost of a Wedding Traditionally

With the average wedding costing almost $20,000, it is obvious that one person will not be paying for all of that. Traditionally, the bride’s family pays for a good portion of things, but that tradition has changed somewhat since the inception of tradition now that the bride and groom no longer tend to live their entire married life in the groom's family home.

The bride, in years past, was typically financially dependent upon her family and rarely paid for much on her own. But now that most women have jobs outside of the home, the bride is responsible for paying for the groom's ring, a wedding gift for her husband-to-be, gifts and a luncheon for her bridesmaids, and accommodations for guests who are coming in from out of town. If she cannot manage that, her family tends to pick up the slack.

The groom is responsible for the bride's wedding ring, as well as a gift for her and his groomsmen and ushers, the bridal bouquet, the corsages of both mothers, his own boutonniere and those of his groomsmen and ushers, the marriage license and fee for the person presiding over the wedding itself, not to mention the limousine and everything for the honeymoon including travel expenses and lodging.

Bridesmaids, the Maid of Honor, the best man, groomsmen, and ushers must generally pay for their own wedding attire. The groomsmen or perhaps just the Best Man tend to pay for the bachelor party, while the bridesmaids or just the Maid of Honor tend to throw at least one shower or prenuptial party for the bride.

It is the responsibility for the groom's family was relatively non- existent traditionally until around the 1950s. Now they help with the wedding by taking care of the expenses for the groom's cake and the rehearsal dinner, as well as the groom's parents' wedding attire. Occasionally they also offer to help pay for certain aspects of the reception.

The bride's family, however, takes care of everything else. This includes the flowers for the reception and bridesmaids' bouquets, anything rented for the wedding and reception, the wedding invitations and programs, specially printed items for the reception, any fees for the wedding venue and various reception fees such as catering and music, photography during the ceremony and reception, the wedding cake and favors for guests, and of course, the wedding attire for the bride's parents.

Guests are mostly concerned with paying for a gift for the couple, their own wedding wear, and whatever travel expenses may be incurred by going to the wedding if it isn't nearby. These traditions and guidelines change based on various factors for the wedding. If this is the bride's second marriage or more, her parents are not required by tradition to help pay for anything. Also, general wedding expenses can be lowered by choosing family members or guests to handle certain aspects themselves (such as food, desserts, decorations, etc.) if they are talented in the field in question and are willing to do so in lieu of giving a gift.

With a breakdown of expenses between a larger group of people, a wedding costing almost $20,000 isn't nearly as bad as first imagined. Charging the financial burden will help those involved to enjoy the day much more without one person thinking about the fact that they basically paid for everything. And in the end, everyone wins and can have a lovely wedding to participate in and look back on fondly over the years.